Mid-holiday-season blues.

I'm having a hard time. I took all my boxes of Christmas decorations out of my storage closet. The boxes are all over the kitchen floor. My apartment is nice and clean. It will look pretty, once my tree and other stuff are up. The problem is that I can't seem to get started. I've been depressed for a few days. Never even got out of pajamas today.

Last year, I got very depressed over the holidays for the second year in a row. I don't want that to happen again this Christmas. I've been fighting off the blues. I'm not bad off, like last year. But I'll get worse, if I don't get going and pull myself together.

Encouragement helps me a lot. If anyone can spare a few words, it would help me. I'm spending way too much time alone. There's a pot luck party I could go to in two weeks. I have to find the courage to go. Social anxiety holds me back. When I fight my social phobia, I usually end up glad I did. Lately, I have trouble just getting out of bed and dressing myself. Nothing is wrong with me physically. Still, I'm wanting to stay lying around just watching videos. Every night I tell myself that I'll do better the following day . . . but I don't.

You’re not alone, @Rose76. This time of year is tough for me. It’s not that I don’t like Christmas, it’s just the pressure I feel. Putting up the decorations is an especially difficult milestone for me. It should be full of joy, but I find it daunting.

However, small steps. We tend to assemble the tree first, then have a coffee, put some Christmas music on, and then bit by bit add some lights, then decs to the tree. There’s no rush, after all. Just take your time. Come back to it after a few hours, or the next day.

I feel better now they’re up. More the mood for Christmas.

Hi Rose,
You can get through this. I'm happy for you that your living space is clean. That makes a huge difference mood wise for me, too. Try little things each day so you do t fall into the abyss. I myself cant wait until January even though there is little stress on me this year. Honestly my favorite thing to do is to watch a Christmas themed movie when my husband has gone to bed (not that he is bad company in any way). I just like that time to myself. One of my favorite movies is The Bishop's Wife with Cary Grant. You have pulled yourself up before and although it may seem to be tough going I am confident you can do it again.

I will look for your posts so keep posting. A little support can go a long way!

I am sorry to hear you're upset. I've read a bit of what you've written in various threads and it seems for me like you someone familiar.
I hope you find some energy in a few days, and this is temporary. I love it when people can celebrate Christmas (I didn't have many of those holidays as a child, and as I've grown up, I've only felt depressed during the holidays).
And you mentioned you have a place to go, it's so cool. I also found a place to go in New Year evening. I think it would be helpful.
People who can lift their spirits with Christmas, I believe in you.

Thank you all for the posts above. I did get the tree up. Yesterday I just fluffed out the branches. Today I'll put up the ornaments. Getting started helped me to feel better.

"The Bishop's Wife" is a movie I too like a lot.

I find this time of year hard. I don't decorate at all so congratulate yourself for doing so.

I'm feeling better than I was when I started this thread. My tree and Nativity set are up. They look nice. I feel fairly confident that I won't get into a bad state over the holidays. I am forcing myself to stay positive, which is kind of working.

I must not isolate. There are things going on that I can participate in - like a neighborhood Christmas party. Socializing does not come natural to me. I have to push myself . . . hard.

Thank you for the posts above. I feel less alone.

I'm sorry you find the holiday season hard. Do you know why that is? In my case, it is being alone that I find tough. I'm trying to do something about that, but venturing out of my shell makes me anxious. There are some opportunities available where I can do some things with others. I must put them on my calendar and commit to showing up. Even though I know getting involved with others helps me, I still have this tendency to shrink into my own little world. It's a battle to make myself not do that.

I'm doing fairly okay. Received a nice gift in the mail today from family. It's nice to be thought of.

I'm putting tinsel on my tree tonight. It seems to take me forever to finish anything I start. Yesterday, I got up early and got a lot done. It took me a long time to get moving today. Mornings are my hardest time. No energy in the morning. Starting my day is such a struggle. There is no good reason for it.

Maybe I'll try strong coffee when I get up. I've known people who can jump start their engines with coffee and a cigarette in the morning. I usually only have coffee with dessert after dinner. I don't smoke. So, a few months ago, I bought caffeine pills and nicotine pills at Walmart. Taking them together made me awfully nauseated, so I won't do that again.

Anyone know a way of feeling energetic in the morning? Even going to bed earlier hasn't helped.

Do you know anyone who could set up a light stretching regimen for you? Someone who might have the knowledge and would know the right way to start that sort of routine? It can be very basic and with 15 minutes or so of doing 10 or so basic stretches your heart rate will rise gently and help your brain wake up. Maybe a coffee 10 or 15 minutes before you start your stretches would help as well.

Would take a few weeks to get used to what you're doing but it can be very easy right out of the gate if you're given the right approach and some appropriate stretches. I ask if you know someone because sometimes [heck, most times] the books and videos out there are for people who are probably already pretty used to this sort of activity. It can often be intimidating. Stretching begun right is recommended for so many things. Done consistently it's kind of a medicine cabinet in itself. I can maybe answer some questions if you have them.

@mar dhea - thank you for giving me something specific to try. I'll bet I could get some ideas online for moderate to easy stretches.

Therapeutic in many ways Rose. A few basics to start.

I'm in a hole today. I was doing pretty good - sort of sticking to a daily schedule, getting up and dressing, getting out of the house. Yesterday, I slipped a bit. Today I fell into the trough.

I'm warning myself not to give in to this.

This is discouraging.

I started to really break down. I tell myself not to give into this. I tell myself, "You have a choice."

You can do this, Rose! Just a bad day! tomorrow can be different.

Thanks, @Deejay14. I'm about to do some cooking. If I get something accomplished, I'll feel a lot better. I have some hope still.

I made a pot of spaghetti sauce. That helped me feel a lot better. Tomorrow I'm going to a Christmas party. That will help me also.

Finding the energy is often hard for me too Rose. Depression can so physiologically draining. If I get at least something done on the bad days then that's a victory. I realize at this point that I can't do every day the same. That's ok though. There's still room and time to change some things for the better. It's like that for you too I'm sure of it.

Keep on keeping on Rose! Enjoy the Christmas party....even if its difficult for you it at least will get you out of the house.

I went to the party, which took pushing myself. I ended up very glad I went.

How did today go ft or you Rose!

Today was a bad day. I haven't even gotten dressed or eaten anything but some cereal. It's like I can't move. I know that's really a choice, because I can move. I just don't.

I'm alone too much. Last eve I had a long talk with someone by phone - kind of a newish friend. It felt good. But I felt unsettled afterwards. Slept good. But today I don't care about anything. I just read and look at videos.

My big, overarching sense is that I have nothing to look forward to . . . that I'll be mostly alone for the remainder of my life.

Being alone can be difficult. Would it help you to schedule activities? Are you in a warm enough place to get outside. Its pretty cold here but I wrap myself up good to sit outside in my chair ( that currently has snow on it ) to get fresh air. Air helps my mood.A couple of times per month I have lunch with my sister

Today I am going to my family Christmas gathering at my nieces home . I am so looking forward to it. My sister from Florida flew in for the weekend so I can't wait to see her. I will be home around nine. Nothing good happens at the party after that time. That time is for the youngins!

Please at least get dressed and get some fresh air.

I've spent all day in my pajamas doing nothing. Just looking at stuff online. All I've eaten are pieces of candy that I got as a gift.

I know this is ridiculous. I'll feel tons better, if I just get up and do some stuff. I'm invited to something on Xmas eve that I'm really glad about.

Thank you, @Deejay14. You are so right. I live in a fairly mild climate. (It was in the 60s here today.) But I feel cold just because I'm not active enough to warm up. It's like I'm frozen. Yesterday, the only thing I did was get into a warm bubble bath. It seems all I want is to be in a cocoon - like the bed or the tub or the couch or the recliner. I don't even feel sad or depressed emotionally. I'm not sick. I just keep living in my head.

I will take a hot shower now and get dressed . . . even though the sun is setting now. The best thing I could do is make a plan this eve for exactly what I'm going tomorrow. Otherwise, I wake up with no concept of what to do next. So I roll over and go back to sleep, or I find a video to watch on my tablet.

I feel pretty hopeful that I can get into a much better space, if I push myself. Family called me this evening, which boosted my spirit. I appreciate the encouragement I get here. I realize now that my planning needs to be detailed. Before going to bed, I should pick out what I'm going to wear next day. I'll be more inclined to get out of the p.j.s, if I already have a picture of me dressed in my head.

I know my challenges are nothing compared to the real tough problems that people deal with every day. That's the craziness of chronically recurring depression. I actually was happier when I had real problems to solve every day. I'm retired, but currently in good health. I can do whatever I want most days. So I wake up and think of a hundred different, interesting things I could do. Then I can't make up my mind which thing to pick. Too many options make me dizzy. So I don't pick one, stay home, and do nothing, but vegetate. That leads to apathy and indifference, which eventually leads to real depression that is no joke.

Well, I'll post tomorrow that I did or didn't make a move in a good direction. This will help me be a bit more accountable, so I don't keep opting to just vegetate. Even if no one reads my posts, I need to read them. Still, I appreciate that anyone visits my thread. I am grateful that I'm not in some grievous predicament. If I look around at the problems some members here are grappling with, it reminds me to count my blessings.

Home from my party. Making a list and physically checking each item off is helpful for me. Small goals Rose. Thinking too big can work against you.