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#1
Dec 14, 2025, 02:53 PM
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I have a upsetting memory and I keep telling myself not real not real I’m twisting it I’m making it up but it doesn’t go away. I usually accept a lot of past traumatic memories fairly okay if with anger but I don’t normally deny it but this memory was a little younger and was at my Grandma’s who I loved and had nothing to do with my dad (and until I got out of high schoool all my trauma was my dad or his friends so maybe once I accepted an initial thing being traumatic it was easier but at my my Grams???)
How do I tell if it was real? It’s been haunting me for years now.
__________________
“Can you understand? Someone, somewhere, can you understand me a little, love me a little?” — Sylvia Plath Dx: PTSD, BPD, eating disorder of ever changing presentation, bipolar Rx: Tegretol, Topamax, and tacos On the other hand, you have different fingers |
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#2
Dec 14, 2025, 05:59 PM
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Quote:
Is there anything that you'd do differently, depending on whether you were satisfied that the memory was (or wasn't) "real"? Or are you more interested in this question as a puzzle that doesn't have to have any real-world consequences? Maybe it's just me, but this discussion reminds me of Chuang Tzu:"Was I a man dreaming I was a butterfly, or am I now a butterfly dreaming I am a man?" |
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#3
Dec 14, 2025, 06:14 PM
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I don't know if I would do anything differently. I would probably give myself more grace for accepting as much abuse as I have because this (could've) happened even earlier in a place I actually thought of as a safe place. I feel like some puzzle pieces would fit. They would make a distressing picture, but it's not like them not put together isn't distressing either.
__________________
“Can you understand? Someone, somewhere, can you understand me a little, love me a little?” — Sylvia Plath Dx: PTSD, BPD, eating disorder of ever changing presentation, bipolar Rx: Tegretol, Topamax, and tacos On the other hand, you have different fingers |
 FooZe
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