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#1
Jan 10, 2025, 04:36 PM
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Hi all,
I hope today's being kind to you. I reconnected with R yesterday for the first time this year, following the festive break. During the session I began to explain how I'd taken a second look at the work of David Kessler over the summer. I hadn't mentioned it until now because we were untangling other stuff. After I'd explained who David Kessler is (he's a well-known grief researcher who studied under Elisabeth Kubler-Ross..) and then explained Elisabeth Kubler Ross' contribution to the grief field...I thought 'I'm sure R is fully aware of this.' My internal critic is vicious...so they could well be at fault here...but.. Have you ever started explaining something to T, and then thought 'Wait....'? Am I overreacting? Lost
__________________
'Somewhere up above the great divide Where the sky is wide, and the clouds are few A man can see his way clear to the light 'You have all the grace you need for today, and today is all that matters.' - Steve Austin |
 corbie, ScarletPimpernel, Yaowen
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#2
Jan 11, 2025, 12:06 PM
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I have had that experience before with therapists. Best wishes to you.
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| corbie
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 LostOnTheTrail
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#3
Jan 11, 2025, 12:15 PM
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I feel that way sometimes. She usually let's me know if she already knows something from life or even what I told her about my personal life. I've been on the other side too. Most the time I actually don't let them know. I want them to tell their stories/knowledge, even if it's a repeat, because they don't have many people to talk to.
__________________
"Odium became your opium..." ~Epica |
| corbie
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| LostOnTheTrail
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#4
Jan 11, 2025, 12:33 PM
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Or worse still.. Something you thought T would know for her to say she doesn't in a "not important for me to know" fashion 😂 thrn you feel dumb for putting so much time into something that's not really that important apart from what you, yourself contributes..
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| corbie
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| LostOnTheTrail
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#5
Jan 11, 2025, 04:09 PM
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Im pretty sure my T gets me to explain things that he already knows anyway. They probably want to know how we understand it and what we make of it all, it could be helpful for them to know that instead of making their own assumptions.
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| corbie, LostOnTheTrail
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#6
Jan 13, 2025, 07:11 AM
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I don't think I do this with her with anything therapy related. I will explain things to her if what I am speaking about is not common knowledge or has some niche element or specificity about it.
Did you notice what her reactions were when you were explaining it to her? What troubles you about having done this? |
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#7
Jan 13, 2025, 07:31 AM
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Thanks, Comrade.
Sometimes when I share things that I've been reading or listening to, I have this sense that I'm trying to do her job for her. She didn't seem offended or perturbed by it, just interested...so I'm likely overthinking, as usual. Appreciate you taking the time to read and respond. Take care, Lost
__________________
'Somewhere up above the great divide Where the sky is wide, and the clouds are few A man can see his way clear to the light 'You have all the grace you need for today, and today is all that matters.' - Steve Austin |
| ScarletPimpernel
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#8
Yesterday, 07:17 AM
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Ah ok. I think I have my own version of doing her job for her. I try and exert a lot of control over the work. For example, I will process a lot of content between sessions in various ways, read related stuff, do creative and somatic stuff, be very clear about what I will discuss in any particular session etc. I think that's all good for me to do, but it does limit things as well. It's like I don't leave room for spontaneity or I limit the relational exploration because so much is happening without her and outside session. It often leaves me asking what is the point of her. I have literally asked her that which I find painful because I don't actually want to be so dismissive of others.
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| ScarletPimpernel
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